0:07 Okay, shall we start the prayer? Let's pray. Dear Father, thank you so much for this day, for allowing each of us to be here. Lord, we believe that you've gathered us here for your purposes, and we pray that you would touch our hearts and speak to 0:22 us. Lord, we pray that you would give us ears of disciples to hear what you have to speak to us. And Lord, please uh fill me with the Holy Spirit that I might speak in a way that honors you. I might speak your words, and that you 0:37 might be exalted in this discussion. Thank you, Lord, for your kindness and for your goodness and for this time that you've given us together. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. So, we want to start by talking about this poem by Annie Johnson Flint. I 0:54 don't know um if are folks familiar with Annie Johnson Flint's story? As a as a person, she was just very briefly, she was bedridden much of her life um because of sickness. And yet, it's a good example of of the heavenly 1:14 bank account. She didn't have much by by way of earthly um means or possessions or even experiences. One of the ways in which we can be rich in this world is rich in experiences. Um but she spent a lot of her life um in bed, in a in a hospital bed, uh 1:34 with bed sores and racked with arthritic pain for years. And yet, she wrote some and I say yet, right? That our even our language belies our beliefs, right? Not despite that, but perhaps because of that, there flowed from her pen many, 1:52 many encouraging and inspiring uh poems. I don't know how many, but there're there are a lot. And um I chose this one because of uh one particular phrase. It's a short poem, but the phrase that that comes to my mind often is in this 2:09 poem, and um maybe just because it's so short we can read it, but then there's one phrase that I'd like to talk a little bit about because the Lord's really laid it on my heart. And then um I I can just share briefly, and then if we want to discuss 2:23 or if you want to share if anything else spoke to you, um I'd love for it to be a a discussion. It says, How broad is his love? Oh, as broad as man's trespass, as wide as the need of the world can be. And yet to the need of one soul it can 2:41 narrow. He came to the world and he came to me. How long is his love? Without end or beginning, eternal as God and his life it must be. For two everlasting as from everlasting, he loveth the world and he loveth me. How deep is his love? 3:00 Oh, as deep as man's sinning, as low as the uttermost vileness can be. In the fathomless gulf of the Father's forsaking, he died for the world and he died for me. How high is his love? It is high as the heavens, as high as the throne of his 3:20 glory must be. And yet from that height he has stooped to redeem us. He so loved the world and he so loved me. How great is his love? Oh, it passeth all knowledge. No man's comprehension its measure can be. It filleth the world, yet each heart may 3:40 contain it. He so loves the world, and he so loves me. The um the phrase in this poem that has has often come to my mind is this phrase here in the middle right in the middle of the page. In the fathomless gulf of the Father's 3:59 forsaking. I can I can hardly speak it because um I feel it's something that we all have to grow in and something Lord has been growing me in is to see the extent of the uh the sacrifice of Jesus and the pain 4:17 um you know, we were talking I was as I was listening just a moment ago I was I was thinking about how Jesus it says he never pleased himself. It says that in Romans. He never pleased himself and it says in Philippians that he he didn't consider 4:32 equality with God a thing to be grasped but he humbled himself and he emptied himself and he became obedient to the point of death. That's why it says for this reason God exalted him. But he's his humbling um one of the ways in which his humbling 4:46 is manifested is the only pleasure he allowed him himself was fellowship with his father. Or that's the only pleasure that he counted. It's the only pleasure that he enjoyed. And if he could have the light of his father's countenance 5:01 upon him, it didn't matter what he had to endure, what he had to be denied, what you know, he didn't consider equality with God a thing to be grasped. We often think about um our rights. I don't know about you but I think about 5:17 my rights. It's one thing it's one thing to die to our wrongs. We want to die to sin but but there's a there's a sense in which we can still have rights. We can still feel like we deserve things. You know, in the house none of you are 5:29 fathers yet but someday you're going to go, "Hey, the dad deserves to be treated a certain way." You know, as an example. And one of the things I've learned is I can't discipline my children out of a sense of offense. Yes, they have to honor their father. If 5:48 I feel dishonored, that's a bad reason to discipline my children. I don't discipline them because I feel dishonored. I discipline them because I have a responsibility to bring up my children in the fear of God and in the 5:59 in the training and righteousness. And I have to be very careful that my heart just as an example of a right, that my heart is free from that self-righteousness which says, "I deserve to be honored." I don't. And the fact that a child is commanded to honor 6:12 his father or mother doesn't mean that father, I'm not deserving of honor. And if I am disciplining, I'm just using that as an example. There can be all sorts of things where we feel self-righteous. And I remember one particular time I I I 6:27 was wrestling somebody in my house. And the Lord said, "It's not You have to die to your rights." It's not enough that you die to your wrongs or you die to, you know, sinful desires or things like that. You also have to die to your rights. And Jesus 6:42 Christ and he brought that verse to mind from Philippians 2. That he he didn't consider equality with God a thing to be grasped. He emptied himself of his rights. And the Lord just kind of showed me that in this one little situation where your 6:55 rights are being denied you, something that's legitimately you could claim it as your right. As the man of the house, whatever that means, right? I mean, the things that we think to ourselves, right? Are laughable as soon as we say them out loud. But in 7:07 that moment the Lord said, "You Does that cup taste bitter? You know that Jesus drank it down to the dregs. He didn't He consider any rights. He was He had to be He had to endure the pain of being born. If you've ever watched childbirth, they It's 7:22 uncomfortable for the mother. Certainly, it's also, I would imagine, hugely uncomfortable for the baby. That is an uncomfortable situation, to say the least. And Jesus humbled himself. And he was born in a manger. Nobody had ever 7:33 been born in a manger, you know, laid in a feed trough. And it's just the extent of his emptying and how he was willing to identify himself with us. But what did he treasure? He treasured that he could have fellowship with his father. 7:49 And as long as he didn't as long as he could have fellowship with his father, there's no amount of emptying that was too much. And he was always willing to be emptied. And And that his whole life was an emptying and emptying and emptying and 8:00 emptying. To the you know, his he he had a need for his brothers to pray with him. They couldn't pray with him. He just kept emptying himself. But then there the final straw so to speak came. When in the Garden of Gethsemane, the 8:18 Father said, "This cup which you're going to have to drink means the one thing that you've enjoyed all your life in this whole life of emptying, the one thing that you've enjoyed, perfect fellowship with me, you're going to be denied." 8:34 And that was That was the only thing that was more that was too much for Jesus to take. And you know, it's easy for us to say when we when we think about that prayer, "Not my will, but yours be done." We are praying that prayer. I don't know about 8:47 you, I'm praying that prayer in regards to something that's not God's will or that's against God's will. And when I say not my will, I'm saying not my sinful desire, but yours be done. But when Jesus said that, when he said not my will, he was saying 9:01 not my will my will being to remain in perfect fellowship with you. Not my will, which is perfectly righteous and good, but yours be done. And on the cross, he suffered eternal hell. As we heard recently at NCCF from 9:19 brother Zach, I thought this was a uh very perfectly put. If If physical death were sufficient payment for my sin, my own death would pay for my sin. How did Jesus pay for our sin? Did he 9:37 pay for our sin by dying? We can say Jesus paid for I mean it's and it's an easy kind of a Sunday schooly thing to say. He paid for my sin by dying on the cross. But what death is his dying on? That's technically true theologically, but what 9:51 is his dying on the cross? And the shallow and simplistic way to think about it is he physically died. But what brother Zach said and what's very important to remember is physical death doesn't save any of us from our sins. Otherwise, whenever we die, we 10:05 would be forgiven and we could go to heaven and Jesus never had to actually come and die. And but what die what death did he die? He died the death that is the penalty of sin, which is separation from God the Father. And my death, which I die in the flesh 10:23 one day, is not separation from God the Father. And when Jesus died on the cross, the real death, the meaningful death, the substitutionary death that he died was the Father's forsaking. And the phrase here that's that often 10:39 comes to my mind is it's a fathomless gulf. You know what fathomless means? Whenever, you know, uh folks at sea are measuring, they measure in fathoms. How many How deep is it? You know, and it's I I don't know what the equivalent is, 10:53 but it's some measurement of depth. And what is true and what Anne E. Johnson Flint has so perfectly said is it's immeasurable. You can't There is no fathom. There's no cord long enough to measure the extent of how much God forsook Jesus Christ. 11:12 The fathomless gulf of the Father's forsaking. And what the Lord has reminded me whenever I read this is, "You have no idea the extent to which I forsook Jesus Christ." And it's it's helpful just to be humble in light of 11:27 a passage like this or in light of a truth like this to say, "Lord, I have no idea the price you paid. I rattle off these Sunday school answers and I rattle off the Romans road or whatever it is is which is my quick easy theology, but it's not cheap. 11:46 The price you paid is absolutely incomprehensible. And for me the thing that I the starting point has to be I don't I have to start with I don't know it. I have no idea. We can all kind of nod our heads and I even I even as I'm 12:00 talking I kind of go, "Yeah, I know. It's impossible to know." But that's that's not the evidence of someone who really appreciates the impossibility of knowing. The impossibility is marked by a awe. It's just I have to stop. 12:15 And for me sometimes when I read this poem and I do read it often, I just stop and I go, "Will you show me just a little bit more?" Because I want to I don't want to take my sin lightly. I don't want to take the price you paid lightly. I have for too 12:29 long. And I don't want to. And what this poem reminds me is I can't ask for enough revelation. I can't ask for enough appreciation because it says that we love because he first loved us. I can only love him to in so far as I 12:45 have been loved by him. I can only show mercy in so far as I have received mercy. And if the mercy I've received is little, I will love little. I will be little merciful to others. And when I'm hard on others, whether it's my children 12:57 or my co-workers or someone who's doing, you know, a half-hearted job in the church what in whatever sphere of my life it might be, if I find myself being harsh, it's because the gulf of the Father's forsaking has become fathomable 13:11 to me. I go, "Yeah, I get it. I know. But this person doesn't get whatever it is they're going through." And I stop I become like that servant who being forgiven an unpayable amount goes out and strangles somebody owes him 13:29 a few bucks. Cuz it's just so easy to forget how much I've been forgiven. And it's really easy for me to forget how much I've been forgiven when I don't contemplate it, when I don't meditate upon it. And one of the things brother Zac mentioned 13:43 on Sunday this just just this past Sunday at CCF at our church in California was um when Jesus on the cross he's he said to me I hadn't heard him say before but it really spoke to me. I think it's in John. I think. 14:08 No, Luke maybe? Uh sorry, one second. Where is it? It's um it's Matthew chapter 27. 14:43 In verse 45. This is the this is the beginning of the three hours that precede the veil being rent in verse 51. It says in the sixth hour darkness fell upon all the land until the ninth hour. 15:01 And about the ninth hour, this is Jesus has been separated from the Father. Um and in the ninth hour Jesus cries out with a loud voice saying, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" And um what brother Zac said that it really 15:18 spoke to me was Jesus didn't even know why he had come. He was so disoriented and senseless. As it says in the Psalms, I've become like a senseless beast. He became so senseless that if you'd ask him, "Why are you on the cross?" he couldn't tell 15:37 you. "Why have you forsaken me?" He had a sense of his mission. Certainly all of his three, you know, three years of ministry, he had a sense of his eternal appointed purpose. And yet on the cross, the moment of his mission being fulfilled, 15:53 "Why have you forsaken me?" And to me it was a really a humbling and eye-opening picture of this line here, in the fathomless gulf of the Father's forsaking. He died for the world and he died for me. He who, apart from whom no thing which is created was 16:12 created, and he with whom everything that was made found its being and in whom all things are held together, him experiencing the Father's, the fathomless gulf of the Father's forsaking, couldn't even remember why he was there. 16:31 And I don't have any answers necessarily, but to me this is it's an important part of a devoted life is is to have a sense of the magnitude of the debt that I owe. 16:50 You look at Mary Magdalene, you know, she's the first person for Jesus to, the resurrected Christ to appear to. She had she was someone who had such a humble sense of her debt. And as long as the cross is easily explainable, 17:08 as long as even the broken fellowship with the Father is easily explainable, I'm not going to be I'm not going to progress in devotion. I'm not going to be able to pursue Jesus Christ as fully as I ought, I feel. Something that the Lord has um 17:27 laid on my heart very clearly. And so, to me I Part of the reason I chose this is because of the simplicity of it. It's not It's not something to be to be um to understand. It's something to seek 17:46 God in. And not to not to attain. Not to get to the point where I go, "Yeah, I get that part. Now I can move on." It's something I don't ever want to move on from the fathomlessness of God's forsaking of Jesus. And the And we 18:02 can also say the fathomlessness of my debt to the Lord. And as we grow in Christ, the the vile sins, probably by God's grace, with the help of the Holy Spirit, they start to fall away a little bit. 18:20 And the overt and, you know, really detestable stuff starts to fall away. And then we get into a lot more of our life and attention is devoted to our inner life, but they're kind of They can be more They can those sins can be more 18:36 easily perceived as kind of fine-tuning. Or, you know, kind of putting the finishing touches on. We can kind of think, "What percentage of the work is done in you?" I don't know if you've ever thought about that. Are you kind of 90% done? 18:49 You think God's kind of, you know, he started out with a really rough sandpaper, but now he's kind of I I heard a carpenter say once that the finger is kind of the final layer of You who work with wood probably know this. I 18:59 found this to be profound. That the finger is kind of like the the finest sandpaper. If you really want to get something sanded smooth, you the last step is, you know, are you at the finger stage? Where it's just we don't need 19:10 rough sandpaper. You know, I'm I'm 95% of the way there. And for me, it's helpful to say you know, I'm not even close. And the sins that the Lord is revealing, you know, Paul, there's a reason that Paul at the end of his life said, "I'm the 19:27 chief of sinners." It's not because he's committing worse sins, it's because he had he started to fathom a little bit the fathomless gulf is created even by the sins of attitude, inward sins, and and wrong thoughts, and 19:45 dispositions that were displeasing to the Lord. He had a sense of their magnitude such that they weighed on him even more greatly than the more blatant stuff that plagued his life prior to his conversion, I believe. And for us, we have to get we have to be 20:02 we have to preserve you know, Jesus said, "Blessed are those who mourn." He didn't say, "Blessed are those who mourned once." Or "Blessed are those who used to mourn." And our lives, if we aren't careful as we grow, could be marked by a past 20:15 mourning. I used to be filthy. I used to be foul. I used to be an uttermost vileness. But that what that what that reveals is I don't really see my present sins as that serious. I really don't see 20:34 the debt that I'm incurring today as in need of a fathomless sacrifice, as in in need of an immeasurable sacrifice. And I would say for myself, one I I've even had the experience in the last couple of months, you know, just like hopefully we we 20:51 almost like you go hiking. You guys I saw on the chat you went on a hike. I'm jealous. I imagine there were beautiful vistas, right? And we can we can think about we get to you know, experiences in our Christian lives where 21:06 we look at them and we go, "Vista of grace or vista of glory." There's this aspect of the Lord's goodness I've never seen before. And that's that must be and praise God for that. I I have also experienced what I what is maybe less 21:22 desirable, but also equally necessary, vistas of unfathomable vileness. I didn't know that was there. That attitude, it's incomprehensible. Just like we go, "Whoa! You see those mountains." You know, you get to like a a a a lookout point. 21:42 And a sense of wonder ought to accompany and not a not a good wonder, but a a mournful and a uh a a desperate wonder ought to accompany. I'm seeing an attitude here. This is not new, but I never called it 22:01 what it was, which is unfathomable vileness. And if I'm going to progress to the next stage from glory to glory, what it takes is an unfathomable gulf of the Father's forsaking of Jesus for me to get from here to there. Even 22:20 though I've walked this far, even though I've hiked this far, even though I've gotten to these peaks and I've seen these glimpses of God's glory, there's also vistas of vileness that require unfathomable forsaking. And it says in Revelation that Jesus is 22:37 says it there before the throne, he's standing as a lamb as slain. He's still got the the gory wounds. And we when we think of how Jesus stands in heaven, we want to think in terms of 22:55 glory. We want to think in terms of spotlessness and woundle- and spotlessness equals woundlessness in our minds, in my mind at least. If he's going to be a spotless lamb, there's no wounds. But, it looks like that in Revelation, like it's kind 23:09 of an ugly sight. And we have to preserve that vision of what it requires for me to continue on in righteousness and continue on with the Lord and to continue to be delivered from these area where I realize I'm the chief of sinners is it's ugly. 23:28 It's vile and the father's forsaking is beyond comprehension. And what I require as a Christian today in terms of sacrifice, in terms of cleansing, in terms of renewal is be my debt is beyond comprehension today. And my need is 23:46 beyond comprehension today. And if there's not that woe is me, I am undone kind of a uh heart response. I don't just like Isaiah said, I don't think I hear I don't get the burning coal to cleanse me. 24:05 It's the one who says, "How can this be?" Like Mary said to the to the angel, "How can this be? The life of Jesus in me? That's impossible." Then the angel says, "With man it's impossible, but with God all things are possible." I don't know 24:20 that the angel would have ever said that to Mary if Mary hadn't said, "How can this be?" And for me the the just to just to kind of wrap, I don't know how we're doing on time. Just to kind of wrap this thought, there has to continue to be 24:35 a how can this be mentality in my heart in my life. Unfathomable, fathomless gulf of the father's forsaking has to characterize every day. And um it's not pretty. But, it's marvelous. 24:53 And it's it it's what it's the way God has appointed. But it That's It's that morning life that I need again this morning. Morning by morning, I need to have that sense of need, that sense of desperation. And at the very least it 25:09 can start with a honest confession, Lord, I thought I understood. I thought I could describe the extent of your sacrifice. I thought I could describe the price that you paid. And we can all say He died. He bled. He was separated from the Father. And 25:28 because each of those things are so sayable, we can think they're understandable. But if we think that they're If we think we've understood, we stop seeking. And And so for me the what this poem does is it just reminds me, don't 25:41 forget. You have no idea. And And it's going to be like that, I think, for for forever. I don't think I'll ever stop wondering. I don't want to And I'm I'm concerned whenever I do stop wondering. So to me this is a This poem is a reminder to me, don't 26:01 stop wondering at the the depth of your debt, the fathomless gulf of the Father's forsaking, and and your need today. Don't stop wondering. And if you stopped wondering, as I often do and as I often have to be reminded, confess it to the 26:16 Lord. Say, Lord, I've started underestimating my debt to you. I started underestimating the extent of your sacrifice. And I want to repent of that. Show Give me a a fresh appreciation. Give me a fresh vision of your sacrifice. Give me a 26:31 fresh vision of the price you paid. Not that I'll fully understand it now, but that I'll start to appreciate it more. That I might love you more. I think it's good to start where Brother Jeremy ended with that question in Luke chapter 1. You guys can turn 26:49 with me. Luke chapter 1. verse 34. And Mary answered, "How can this be? How can I have the life of Jesus in me?" was her question 27:07 that Jeremy just quoted. And this was the answer. The angel said, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. And for that reason the holy child shall be called the Son of God." So, 27:26 it's the Holy Spirit that will take the impossible of bringing the life of Christ in each one of us. And so, the article again, we can turn to article number 14. And 27:50 we were talking about how God brings us to a very, very low point in our life. And the purpose of him bringing us to a low point in our life is not that he has pleasure in bringing us to that low point, but it says in uh and I'll have to I forgot to take my 28:08 living Bible, but it's in Lamentations 3 33. And I'll read it I'll try to read it later, but Lamentations 3:33, it's not God's pleasure to bring us all these afflictions. There's a purpose in it to bring us into 28:27 a low point. And here for Brother Zach, the low point was he had a lot of things externally that were going well. Ministry was going well, gifting was he had gift to preach and share God's word, but the concern he had in his life in his 28:43 personal life was not that for a greater anointing in preaching and his gift. His greater desperation was "Lord, I have these gifts and all these people are looking at me and seeing this and they're being touched by my ministry, 29:00 but in in my inner life, I'm struggling. What I'm preaching doesn't match what my inner life is." And that's where he says, you know, God had to break him through circumstances. And he speaks about that I mean, that he goes and he's getting 29:17 Once he moves to Bangalore, he's getting sick because of asthma. And God is using all these different circumstances in his life to bring him to a low point. And I I'm reminded of Mary uh No, actually, it's not Mary. A woman who had 29:35 the issue of blood. It says in Mark 5, you can turn with me there to Mark 5. Verse 25, a woman had a hemorrhage or bleeding for 12 years and had endured much 29:53 at the hands of many physicians and spent all she had and was not helped at all, but rather had grown worse. And the Lord allowed that to happen for 12 years, bleeding and all of this happening. And there was this faint 30:12 hope every time she went to a new doctor, "Maybe this is the time I'm going to get the healing. I'm going to get the answer." And every time it was disappointment, disappointment. Each doctor brought more disappointment. And it said that she 30:27 became rather rather than even getting a little bit better, it got worse. And then you know that she touched the hem of Jesus' garment saying that if I touch him, I may be healed. And it says here, "Who touched me?" Jesus asked in verse 30:44 31. And then in 34, or 33, "The woman, fearing and trembling, aware of what had happened to her, came and fell down before him and told him the whole truth." And Jesus said to her, "Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace and be healed 31:03 of her affliction." And I think about this woman, it's kind of like us. We go and seek for so many things in desperation, and hoping it It could be even this conference. I come here seeking for something so that my life 31:16 will be changed. I'll be transformed into the likeness of Christ. There's something we come and seeking. And sometimes it's disappointment. We came here and we got even more disappointment that it didn't turn out the way we 31:30 wanted. And if you went to that woman and asked her, "After 12 years of suffering under the hands of multiple physicians and being worse off, what do you think? What's your testimony?" I believe she would have said, 31:49 "It was all worth it because through all those disappointments and getting worse, it led me to touch Jesus. I got in touch with Jesus through all those 12 years of trial and disappointment, breaking." And I believe that's what it says, like 32:07 I said in Lamentations, it's not God's pleasure. He doesn't get some pleasure in breaking us. It's because of what comes after the 12 years that he allows for those circumstances in our life. Because we come into a such a desperate situation, 32:21 Lord, "Unless you meet with me, Lord, I have no hope." And again, it's not in gifting. And so you turn with me to uh Romans. God gives gifts which he doesn't know he doesn't take 32:39 away. It says in in Romans 11, you can turn with me. Romans 11:29, "For the gifts and calling of God are irrevocable." Meaning he won't take away. Once he's given a gift and that's why we see even the devil knows the scripture. The devil has the 32:56 ability to bring down uh thing on Job's family and all of that. He has powers and things like that because at one point in time God had given those gifts to him. But the important thing is when we ask, "Lord, I want to be filled with God's 33:12 Holy Spirit." And like we read here, when Brother Zach was asking to be filled with God's Holy Spirit, at this point in time he was not asking, "Lord, give me my extra gifts." He had the gifts. He was preaching already. 33:25 What was he asking for when he asked, "Lord, I want the power of your Holy Spirit again. I want you to meet with me again." And that's why as I was reading this, Lord, uh uh reading this the cry for me as well, "Lord, I want 33:40 this in-filling of the Holy Spirit." Yes, I do believe that Jesus had both the in-fillings of the Holy Spirit for fruit in his life and gifts. But at this point in time, when Brother Zach was seeking for the fullness of the 33:59 Holy Spirit, he was seeking for that inner life. It says in John 7:37, "Out of your inner most beings shall flow rivers of living water." And for me also, I say, "Lord, I do not want it to be I do anything which does not come from 34:17 the inside, Lord. I want you to first fill me in the inside and out of that overflow, Lord, let it come out, Lord. But I don't want it to be something, Lord, that It says that when that rock, you guys remember when that rock was smitten, and 34:32 it says in 1 Corinthians 10, the rock was Christ. When it was smitten, it was broken. It fed 2 million people. That I quenched the thirst of 2 million people. It was a breaking that happened before that water came out. And Jesus, 34:51 you know, that was Jesus. So, God is saying that Jesus even had to go this way of breaking for that water to flow. It wasn't It didn't come without come without that breaking. And if it didn't come for Jesus without that 35:05 breaking, there's no other way for us also to receive God's fullness of His Holy Spirit. And so, he wanted to be a pastor in the in in the church there, and he said two conditions. Don't give me a title. I want to just be a brother as every 35:21 other brother, and I don't want a salary. And so, he was preaching. And as he was preaching, God was ministering to those people, but he saw this need that his inner life did not match what he was preaching. And for each of us also, we have to be 35:36 honest with ourselves. How is it what we are on Sunday which people see, and how is it with the rest of the week? And if it is different, there's two options. One, you see the life you have on the on your Sunday, and you say, "You know what? 35:54 I don't have that life at home. So, let me have a poor testimony on Sunday, too, so that I can match it with my poor testimony." That's one way of looking at it. Or the other one, which is the better way or the right way of looking at it, is okay, 36:08 this testimony I have on Sunday, Lord, change my life that I have on Sunday for the rest of the week, Lord. But I find myself unable to do. I'm in desperation. Meet with me. And he wanted to confess before that church that day. If you probably read 36:27 this on that Sunday when that preacher was there. I'm a hypocrite in front of that church. He was willing to do whatever it took to set that distance which he felt was there. The Lord that he The Lord put his finger on. 36:43 It's hypocrisy, he said, was the thing that the Lord put on his life. And he was willing to do that. And the Lord will ask us, it may not be in that situation, but there will be something that he puts his finger on. Something that's most precious to us. 37:01 And when God saw that he was willing to do that, God didn't make him share that publicly because he had already offered it on the inside. And that's when he started seeking again for the infilling of the Holy Spirit. And for us, it's not a one-time 37:19 experience. We will come to brokenness after brokenness and brokenness so that we can constantly be filled. And I see that the capacity we have when we're born again is like a cup. It says, I believe it's in one Psalm 19 37:34 118 or 116 where it's a cup of salvation. Then it's a fountain. And then it's a well. And then it's many rivers, but it doesn't start with many rivers. It starts with that cup. And if we're faithful with that cup, Lord, fill me, Lord, at the capacity 37:51 that I have right now. I want to be faithful, Lord. I think about Samson in the Old Testament. He could tear a lion into shreds easily. That wasn't a problem for him. The Holy Spirit came mightily upon him. 38:11 He tore it up. But the lion he couldn't tear up, and I heard this years ago, and I knew it was true in my life. The lion I couldn't tear up was the lust in my heart. That would tear me up. The anger inside me would tear me up. 38:27 Unforgiveness, bitterness, all of those lions would tear me up. As it did for Samson. He had lust which he could not control. It tore him up. But did he have external gift? Yes, he had external gift to tear the outward lion. 38:45 I don't believe if you were to look at Samson, and this is just my opinion on the matter. I don't think he was well built and strong externally. And this is just my opinion. And the reason I have that opinion is because if 39:01 a thousand Philistines were to come and attack this man. The first one comes, he kills him. The second one he comes, he kills him. And a thousand people, think of a thousand people, it's like 20 school buses of people. That's how much 39:17 approximately a thousand people is. So you have one school bus come and all of the people will get down. He kills all of them. 50 people and the next one comes and one after another each one comes. By the 900th person, he'll be like, 39:32 okay, there's something about this man that he's going to kill me. But even the thousandth guy felt he had a chance to kill Samson because externally he looked like this guy? I surely should be able to kill him. 39:50 These 999 guys didn't know something which I know. That's why I believe you externally there was nothing special in the man. It was the Holy Spirit that came upon him mightily that helped him kill the thing. And same thing with lust and everything else. I 40:07 see a principle there. It's not in the external things. It's something that God does supernaturally that we cannot do. It's that blood that we cannot cure the healing of with all the physicians and everybody else that God alone has to do and he brings 40:22 us to that place of desperation. Lord, Lord, unless you help me I cannot do this. And I love these examples of practical examples like in Brother Acts' life where he honest this is where I was and that's why I sought the Lord for the 40:38 Holy Spirit. Not for gifts but for the reality inside of the innermost being filled up. That which Samson didn't experience to destroy the lions inside he wanted to experience. You see how Delilah day after day and finally he said, "You know what? 40:57 This is a vexing me. I I give in. I give it to you." And his eyes are plucked out and everything. And that's what lust has done to each of our lives and anger, bitterness, bitterness. If you're honest with yourselves, you'll say, "Yes." 41:13 And there is a sad piece of scripture there where it says the Lord left him and he did not even know. He thought he could do what he did in the past. He did not realize his strength had come always had come from the God from God filling him. 41:30 And he did not know that the Lord had left him. And so even as we see that my heart is Lord, I don't Yes, Lord, gifts are important but more than that I want anything that comes out of my life come first from the innermost being. That's 41:47 more precious to me. Lord And for each one of us, each one of us we can seek that. We can seek for that reality of life for the innermost being. It says there, you know, why else why also do I want to seek for God's Holy 42:05 Spirit? Like it says in John 16:12 and you can see that the Lord really kept speaking that. "Actually, I have much more things to say to you. And the Holy Spirit when He comes, He's going to take from me and He's going to tell you. 42:23 Are you willing to listen to what I have to say? I'm I'm ready to share. I have so much in my heart to share with you. Yes, Lord. Fill me, Lord, with your Holy Spirit so that the Holy Spirit in greater measure can take from you 42:37 and share in my heart. I want to experience I want to know. I want to search out the unfathomable. I want to search I want to keep seeking, Lord, because the more I see how much you love me, how much you are merciful to me, 42:52 that's what I'm going to be able to give out to others. I cannot give out to someone else love and mercy that I've not experienced. If I'm hard on others, that's what I've experienced in my own personal walk with the Lord. 43:06 And so I want to be very desperate, Lord, for you to reveal yourself. Like I said, the scriptures, I could read the exact same scriptures as someone else and get something that God did not intend me to receive from that 43:21 unless the Holy Spirit fills me. And I think about how when you read this in Genesis 24, again, I believe it's Judges 14, 15, and 16, Samson. So you can read back later for Samson. I believe it's Judges 14, 43:40 15, and 16. Genesis 24, you guys know what story? Genesis 24, Isaac. Abraham says I'm I want to find a son. I I mean I'm sorry, for my son I want to 43:59 find a bride. And he sends Eliezer to go and find a bride. And as he goes, finds Rebecca. Supernatural way he's led to Rebecca. And once he finds Rebecca he asks her, "Do you want to go?" 44:17 And she says, "Yes, I will go." And that conversation taking from me, taking from Jesus and sharing with me. We are all we don't see Jesus face-to-face today. Our bridegroom is sitting there waiting. He's preparing a place for us and a 44:35 feast for us, a wedding feast for us, his bride. But as we're on this journey from wherever Rebecca was living to wherever Isaac was living those many weeks of journey as they were traveling. The constant yearning in the bride's 44:56 heart, Rebecca's heart was "Tell me more about this bridegroom I've never seen. Tell me about Isaac. I want you to take from what you know of him and share with me." Only the Holy Spirit can take from Jesus and share with us. And I say, "Lord, 45:13 fill me with the Holy Spirit for that reason because I want to know my bridegroom." More than gifts, more than external ministry, Lord, I want to know you, my bridegroom. I want to know what you did for me, how much you love me, how much you care 45:30 for me, care for me personally. Okay. So, uh now we have a chance to consider this this last article for this this session. Um article number 11, "Emptied from Vessel to Vessel." I apologize for submitting uh 45:49 a long a long article. I tried to counterbalance it with a short poem. So, on average these were roughly the same. You probably got to number eight and go, "Oh, good." And then you get to 11, "Uh-oh. Okay." So, um so I'd love to hear if uh there any 46:04 points that resonate with you. I think that we can all relate to trials. We can all relate to difficulties. I really liked how this author mentions a few particular trials and kind of describes them in depth. I found that to be very helpful. 46:24 But this maybe we can just start by turning to Jeremiah 48. This verse that it refers to. I don't know if you had a chance to take a look at that as you were reading. But it speaks here of Moab. And um 46:45 I think that we can probably relate to Moab as we heard earlier living in modern-day Sodom. Ease, careless ease is one of the sins of Sodom we we read elsewhere. But it says Moab has been at ease just like Sodom. Been at ease since his youth. 47:02 And that's a danger for us as well in these days. We've been undisturbed like wine on its dregs. And we have not been emptied from vessel to vessel nor have we gone into exile. Therefore, we retain our flavor and our aroma has not changed. 47:19 And we all I believe we all want this life that's described in 2 Corinthians chapter 2 just with that context Jeremiah 48. Um if you look at 2 Corinthians chapter 2 which the article mentions 47:37 2 Corinthians a little bit later. But in verse 14 it says, "But thanks be to God who always leads us in triumph in Christ and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of him in every place. 47:56 For we are a fragrance of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perish perishing. We can stop there for a second. We want to have the aroma of Jesus Christ in us and we want to be an aroma 48:10 of Christ in every place, it says. Every place, that's the hope that we have. But we can make the mistake of thinking it's automatic or we we we are converted and all of a sudden we should start emitting the fragrance of Christ. But 48:26 what we learn from Jeremiah 48 and what we learn from this article and furthermore, what you learn from Paul's own testimony, which is referenced in the article, even in this book in 2 Corinthians, it's not just instantaneous 48:39 aroma. Right? There's a process that the Lord undertakes in our lives to empty us of our own fragrance. Why do I smell like me? The reason I smell like me is, as this article has stated, like Moab, 48:57 I'm at ease. And I haven't been broken through the emptying processes that the Lord has appointed. The Lord's in his appointment he desires to empty me of my Jeremy aroma and to impart the fragrance of Christ. But I'll never take on the fragrance of 49:16 Christ and you can put your name there too, we'll never take on the fragrance of Christ if like Moab, you're undisturbed. That's why the Lord allows disturbances. If you're if you remain at ease, you don't take on the aroma of Christ. 49:31 And so what does the Lord do? Well, if we look at 2 Corinthians 11, which this article mentioned, but it's good because we see in 2 Corinthians 2, we go, "Oh, I want that, right? Sign me up for the aroma of Christ program. That sounds 49:43 great. Every place, the knowledge of It's like, "Yeah, that's great." Well, then how did you get there, Paul? 2 Corinthians 11. Verse 23. Are they servants of Christ? I'm going to speak like a crazy person. I'm even more so. I've labored more. I've been in 50:02 more I've been in jail more. I've been beaten more. I've been in danger of death more. Five times I received from the Jews 39 lashes. Three times I was beaten with rods. Once I was stoned. Three times I was shipwrecked. A day in 50:14 the A night and day I've spent in the deep. I've been on frequent journeys. Inconvenienced. In dangers from rivers, dangers from robbers, dangers from my countrymen, dangers from the Gentiles, dangers in the city, dangers in the 50:25 wilderness, dangers on the sea. Can you be in any more danger? Yes, dangers from false brethren. I have been in labor and hardship through many sleepless nights and hunger and in thirst, often without food, in cold and exposure. And then what? 50:41 We are, you know, then you can come to 2 Corinthians 2. Thanks be to God who always leads us in triumph in Christ and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of him in every place. How did he How did the Lord impart the aroma of 50:57 Christ? It was through all of these emptying circumstances. And it's something that I can never be reminded of enough. It says in Hebrews, "Encourage one another daily so that there doesn't develop in any one of you an evil unbelieving heart that 51:15 falls away from the living God." And I have to be encouraged every day. There's a reason for these trials. There's a reason for these circumstances that the Lord has appointed. For me the If If you If you kind of zoned out, I 51:30 don't blame you in in reading this. It's a little bit long, but if you look at um I don't know. Look at If you look at 11, the first page, flip once, and then flip twice. And at the top it says we are often willing. That's That's at the top of the page I'm 51:47 looking at. But to me, this is this kind of captures the part one of the two things that really spoke to me from this that I wanted to point out. You can look at It says uh four paragraphs down, "There are many other vessels, each so different in 52:00 character." And you can think about the vessels, they're probably vessels and circumstances that came to your mind as you read this, right? Put those there. We can't time We can't take time to speak of them all, but what determines 52:10 This is the key. What determines whether we're going to be quickly refined or not is not just the number of vessels into which we are poured, but our attitude while we are being poured. If we allow ourselves to be poured, yet 52:24 have a rigid and unbroken spirit, then the object of the pouring is lost. You could say that you've been emptied from vessel to vessel, but you still attain you you still retained your aroma. The soul will still retain its own 52:36 shape, and the sediment will never settle. Such a person may be willing even to die as a martyr for the Lord's cause. What a What a striking and sobering line. And yet, frustrate God's purposes because he is not broken in spirit. 52:52 And so, the question in each of the circumstances that the Lord pours us into, so to speak, many of which Paul describes there in his own kind of autobiography, what is he trying to accomplish? A brokenness. And what What determines whether I'm 53:07 broken? What's my attitude? Am I willing? Am I yielded? Or am I resistant? And one of the pictures that's come to mind I mean, just for me and my own trial, everybody's got their own situation. But for me and my own trial, 53:20 one of the pictures that's come to me many times is the picture of the trial that Abraham experienced when his little punk nephew Lot and his servants started fighting with him. And Abraham's attitude, we don't have to turn there now, but you can look at it 53:35 later. Abraham's attitude was, "We're brothers. What part of land do you want?" He's And what I And what I love there is, one, they're not brothers. And two, he has every right to choose for himself. But three, he yielded and 53:49 said, "What do you want? You take what you want." And God look at looked after Abraham. I The other day we were we were on a family trip and everybody's got a pocket knife except the little one for a reason. So, we're not stupid. 54:04 But one of my kids said, "Hey, we've all got knives except the little one. What happens if we see a bear?" You know what I said And we did see a bear. But you know what I said? "I'll protect her." You guys What am I saying? You guys look 54:16 after You guys with knives look after yourselves. I'll protect the one who doesn't have a knife. But it I've seen that I think Tozer once said, you know, if I can't remember the exact quote, but it's something to the effect of the one 54:28 who defends himself has himself as his defender. But the one who comes defenseless before the Lord has none other than God almighty as his defender. And the question in many of the circumstances, at least that I've been 54:39 experiencing, is, "Jeremy, are you going to be your defender or will you let allow me to be your defender? Are you going to scheme and plot and divvy up the land or will you say to to Lot, even though he's a punk, you get your choice, so to speak, right? 54:56 I'm obviously in a different situation, but take your choice We're brothers. Take your choice of the land." And that And to me, that's it That's an example of the yieldedness of spirit that I mean, Abraham didn't lose there. 55:09 That's what I have to remind myself. He didn't lose. He got He and his descendants got all the land. And so, you can imagine Lot thinking he got the he got the good end of the deal. He got nothing other than, you know, his 55:22 wife being tragically, you know, killed and his losing his daughters and incest and all sorts of terrible things. And Abraham got the promised land. But it's that unpossessive, undefensive 55:40 attitude in the midst of a trial. There he would have had every right to say, "Listen here, buddy. I took you along with me even though you even though you're like you've been whining and complaining. I've put up with your servants and your cattle and 55:54 livestock even though I'm the patriarch, but let's get real now, right? He would have had every right to do that, but he didn't. And to me it's a it's a great picture of yieldedness, a great picture of brokenness. Um that's just one example. And but the 56:09 Lord has given me that as an example. And And what I would encourage each of you is in the vessels that you're being poured into, what's the picture that the Lord's given you? What's the example the Lord's given you? What's the verse the 56:20 Lord's given you? You have to I find that there's a lot of strength I can face and and and be yielded in any trial if I have the word of the Lord to strengthen me, the word of the Lord to stand on. Jesus said, "Man shall not live by bread 56:35 alone, but by every word which proceeds from the mouth of God." And I have to believe that Paul as he described the beatings and the lashings and the shipwrecks and the sleeplessness and the cold and all that, he was being 56:45 strengthened by God. The Lord, the Holy Spirit was strengthening him and comforting him and disclosing the things of Christ to him. And he could say, "We're abounding. We're triumphing in all these situations. The fragrance of 56:57 Christ is being emitted because he's being emptied and he's being willing." And that's to me it's so it it's it's so important. Just as he says here, what determines whether we're going to be refined is what's our attitude while 57:14 we're being poured. What is my attitude? I love one time I heard Brother Zach uh I was reminded of this because I there's a situation which I read some David Wilkerson article recently and he used this phrase um "Pray for those who spitefully use you." 57:29 And I thought, "Oh, that's a good word. Pray for those who spitefully use you." I And that's word I needed. Um And I thank God, "Wow, now I have a chance to pray for those who spitefully use me." And I remembered Brother Zach saying once, "I thank God 57:44 whenever someone cursed me because I was never able to obey the command to bless those who curse until someone cursed me." And if I have a passion to obey all the commands of God, eventually someone's got to curse me or I never get the 57:55 chance to obey the command of to bless those who curse. And I was reminded of that cuz I go, "Wow, now I have a chance to pray for those who spitefully use me." But it's that it speaks of that attitude. What's our attitude while 58:06 we're being poured? But I say, "Great, this is a chance to obey a command that I've never been able to obey before." Or do I have an attitude of self-pity and an attitude of resistance and an attitude of irritation and and 58:18 resentfulness? And if we see it, "Wow, this is another chance for me to obey the Lord," then we can we can you know, it says I J mentioned uh 2 Corinthians 3:18, it says maybe we can look there real quick. Actually, it's 58:35 we're right here. Great. Um 2 Corinthians 3:18, it says, "We all with un- unveiled face beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory as from the Lord the Spirit." So, what 58:49 we see here if if we want to if we want to be transformed into the image of the Lord, what do we need? We need for the Holy Spirit to reveal to us the glory of the Lord. We have to see the glory that the Lord wants to transform us into. And a lot of 59:03 times it's when we enter into these situations that the Lord that the Lord the Spirit gives us a vision of the glory of Jesus and he goes, "That's what I want you to be like." You didn't know it, but I wanted you to be like that. 59:15 Like a lamb is silent before it shears. That's what that means. Be silent like that. And then he's able to transform us into that likeness which he reveals to us. But it's a lot of times it's sometimes it's as we're almost groping 59:27 in the dark in the midst of these vessels being emptying that we go that all of a sudden we're asking Lord for help and he shows us what Jesus is like and he shows us that's what I want to transform you into. And then we can have hope. 59:41 The other thing that I wanted to mention from this article is um It's just at the bottom of the next page. It says the third reason that's it's the last paragraph at the bottom of that next page. The third reason to broaden is to broaden our sympathy for 59:56 and understanding of others. The one who's had but few trials in life is not likely to be a very helpful person. But one who's gone through a hundred and one trials, disappointing experiences, deaths, blasted hopes, shocks, and a 1:00:09 tragedy or two has learned his lesson who because of practice has his senses trained. Such a person is worth something. He's able to enter into the needs of suffering humanity and pray things through. He can enter into sympathetic fellowship with someone 1:00:24 who's in agony of spirit because of some trial. And I wonder the question that I wanted to ask you all to consider is how much do you value how much do you I value? The Lord's asked me this many times being sympathetic to others. 1:00:39 Is it worthwhile to you to know that what perhaps the reason Lord's bringing you through this is because he's going to bring someone else through it and he wants you to be able to it says also in the same letter that we comfort others in 2 Corinthians 1 1:00:52 with this comfort that we receive from God. So if he's bringing me through a situation, he wants to equip me to also be a blessing to someone else. But if I if I disparage or if I don't really value being a comfort and being a being 1:01:09 sympathetic with others, then I won't endure in the trial, then I won't be yielded in the trial. But for me like the there's an amazing thing that Paul says in 2 Corinthians 4 here. We're just all over 2 Corinthians right now. 1:01:24 But he says um in 2 Corinthians 4:10, "We're always carrying about in the body the dying of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may be manifested in our body. For we who live are constantly being delivered over to death for Jesus' sake so that the life 1:01:38 of Jesus may be manifested in our mortal flesh." And we know that as we as as we bear in our bodies the dying of Jesus, we're we're manifesting life of Christ. I heard Brother Zach say at one of the Bangalore conferences years ago, "That's 1:01:51 not the high point of this passage. The high point of this passage is the next verse. So death works in us, but life in you." And it's really it's really uh natural to say, "I want the life of Jesus be manifested in me." And I'm 1:02:05 willing to endure this trial so that the life of Jesus can be manifested in me. But the the higher calling is that I might have a passion for life to be manifested in others. That's what Jesus That's the passion Jesus had. It says that he had to be 1:02:20 made I think Hebrews 2. He had to be made like his brethren in all things so that he might become a sympathetic high priest in the things pertaining to God. He had to be. It was It was It was of utmost importance to him to be made like 1:02:33 his brethren in all things. Why? So that he could become sympathetic. It says, "Therefore let us boldly approach the throne because we don't have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weakness, but we have one who was 1:02:44 tempted in all points like we are, right?" So in Hebrews 4:16, we're told to boldly approach the throne on the basis of what? On the basis of Jesus' sympathy. He comes When we come to him, he says, "I know. I've experienced it." And he uh 1:02:59 the the question that that's been on my mind is do I have He He clearly had that passion to be approachable. He had a passion to be sympathetic. Do I have that same passion? To be approachable and to be sympathetic. Am I willing to endure 1:03:14 hardships and labor and, you know, hunger and sleepless nights and all that stuff. Even if it's not for a benefit for me, if it's just for a benefit for someone else. It's really easy to have like a selfish Christian walk. 1:03:28 As long as I'm more like Jesus, that's great. What if What if it's just {quote} just for someone else's benefit? Am I willing to be emptied that someone else might be encouraged? That someone else might be built up or strengthened. 1:03:41 Am I willing to be for that? And I see that the Lord has that passion. I've seen for me all too often I have that self-centered attitude and I don't have that willingness to be emptied on behalf of others. But that that line here in 2 Corinthians 4 1:03:59 verse 12, death works in us but life in you. I want that to be to be my um my hope in the midst of the vessels that the Lord is pouring me into. Cuz it says actually if we go back to that verse in 2 Corinthians 2 that we started with. 1:04:20 It says in verse 15 that we're a fragrance of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing. From one an aroma from death to death an aroma from from life to life. But who does the aroma benefit? It benefits 1:04:37 others. Why do I want to have the aroma of Christ? It's not so that I can smell good. So that I can smell good so that they go, "Wow, he's got the aroma." It's so that others can say, "Wow, that's what Jesus is like." That's how Jesus is, right? And And it's 1:04:51 for their benefit that they might be strengthened and and and built up. It's not about the It's not about the the person giving the fragrance, it's about the person being refreshed by the fragrance. Hey.
